I hate retail Valentines Day

Twas a typical Valentine's Day at work today. Men rushing in, glancing over the chocolate, grabbing a box and leaving. Women rushing in, meticulously taking their time picking out pieces of candy that are only going to be devoured in a matter of hours.

And then, chaos struck. The candy box guys showed up. These are two men that work on the slope, who buy candy with company money. They always want several boxes made up. Today was no exception. And, without exception, they manage to always bring a ton of people in with them. The store will be dead before they arrive. And once they walk in the door, we get slammed. They come in every couple months, and every time this happens. I can only think of one exception.

They came in today, and we were overwhelmed with customers, my boss and I, all wanting candy at once. I made 3 boxes for the first man and my boss started in on the 2nd. Not sure how many she made. At least 4. All the while, the customers left out are getting more and more agitated. I hate it when that happens. If you all would spend more money all the time, we could have more help on a day like today!

We finally got all of the customers out the door. And then it happened again. And again. I filled candy all day, and made boxes.

Some other highlights:
- A man walks in, "Is the candy straight from the Amazon?" "Mmm, no, ---" "Oh well, better get my antioxidant fix."
- A hard of hearing Native man who when I give him a choice (Milk, or dark?) responds with "yes". Therefore, you will take what I give you and like it. If you don't give me a satisfactory answer, I don't have time to waste on questioning you.
- My boss dealt with a man who was so indecisive and unsure of what to get that she had to help him along. "You have 3 pieces. You need 12 more. What else would you like?" "I thought you were going to pick them..*confused*" Um. No, we don't know what your wife likes. "Well, is coconut ok?" "NO, she hates coconut!" There you go. At least you know her that well.
- Old hippie guy started playing one of our wooden flutes in the store. Kinda obnoxious, but he was in the other room. We could handle it. He purchased it and his wife says, "Why don't you play your flute, honey?" *Resume playing for 5 minutes while they wander the store.* Please...go outside.

Definitely an obnoxious day today. We made lots of money, but it felt just like summer already. I am so not eager for that to start again. I hate Valentine's Day in retail

Rants

Just because a product is listed on the website, does not mean that our store carries it. Yes, it is probably not marked as not being in all stores and should be. Order it from the website!
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"Most stores are open later around Christmas".....We ARE open later. Nobody else is open past 6 anyway. Nor does anyone come in after 6. Not worth the electricity or the payroll just for you to come in later.
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Wanting me to somehow place a divider in a box of chocolates for sugar free and regular is not exactly the easiest thing in the world. And I have no classy way of putting a note in saying which side is or isn't sugar free...
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When you are a regular customer, how does one manage to suddenly decide to push on the door with all of your might thinking it will open? There's a doorknob for a reason!
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Holding a tin of mints, "Does this have rocks in it?" Um, no...why would I sell rocks in a fancy tin? And why would about 2 other customers ask the same thing on the same day??
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At 12pm, 2 hours after we open - "Well, it was worth opening the store up for us!" Yea, you and your $50 sale......hardly.
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"Can I mail a knife?" I dunno, I don't work at the post office.
"Can you mail this for me?" Again, I don't work at the post office!
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"Do you work here?" No, I like to put on a dumb denim jacket and red apron proclaiming the name of the company for the heck of it.
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If it says that each piece is .25 a piece, why are you sampling it? Do you think I won't charge you for it? If you ask to sample it, I won't charge you for it!
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It's too "Alaska-y" in here....oh man. It's a tourist shop! Of course it is!

Little boy and the fan

A little boy came in with his father and immediately saw the fan on the ceiling. It was turned off, but he was immediately mesmerized by it. His dad drug him along but a few minutes later, we heard, "Do you want to go look at the fan? Let's go!" The dad brought the boy back, eagerly, and my coworker turned on the fan, much to his delight. The little boy tried to run directly underneath the fan, but couldn't access the location. It was adorable!

$2 Bills

We get $2 bills often at my work. Most of the time, one of the employees takes them home. I've gotten tired of collecting them, but every once in a while I will snag one. $2 is a lot to shell out for a piece of currency still in use! Anyway, last weekend, we had a customer who was a little irritating, and he rang up an order of $169. Then as the icing on the cake, he says, "You're going to hate me when I pay ^-^" We were all, yea, whatever. He pulls out a huge wad of 2 dollar bills. And paid us $170 in them. Turns out, he pulls them out of the bank by the hundreds and pays for stuff with them. He was on a trip and had started off with $2000 in his wallet. WHO on earth does that?

Please don't ever do this, people!

Noteworthy things heard this summer...

Customer: "Where are your parkas?"
Me: ".....it doesn't get cold enough for parkas here..."
Customer: "Oh really?"

Customer: "I just love the water in this country"

A teenage boy on his cell phone: "No one has a myspace in a 20 mile radius here!"
(Not sure where exactly he was looking...)

Customer: "Where is the stage coach road?"
Us: "Stage Coach? There is no stage coach here..."
Turns out, she meant Skyline...

Older lady about her son: "You don't like dark chocolate? What a wussie!"

Kid: "It's too Alaska-y in here!"

Here are a couple of things I heard from other locals about what tourists asked...
- "When are you going to finish the construction across the bay?" (meaning, when is the Spit going to stretch the rest of the way)
- A tourist assumed that the Spit is covered by water everytime the tide comes in. Now, how would we have buildings and people that live out there if the tide came in and covered everything twice a day?
- At a park in the interior: "When do you let the animals out?" and "When do you turn on the northern lights?"


That's all for now!

Hello!

Hello everyone! I've been meaning to work on this blog since the start of summer and just have not sat down to do it. I was originally going to anonymously blog about my work with the tourists. I was just going to make it for myself to have a record of all the crazy things that happen at work. This isn't Waiter Rant, where I have to stay anonymous, but I'm not going to divulge information that would be obvious.

So the point of this blog will be to tell the hilarious, but often ridiculous or irritating stories of my customers. And also be informative on how to be a better customer yourself.

Enjoy!